Reminder Day

Like a lot of us, I’ve been in a cycle of worry, of feeling sad, and even being short-tempered with my husband, when he doesn’t deserve it. I HATE that!

I fret about my parents and their health.

There have been other family health issues as well. My mother-in-law just went through Hurricane Ida. Oh, yeah, we’re still dealing with Covid and decisions to get the shot or not get the shot, to mask or not mask, to stay open and go into lockdown again.  I am in this cycle of unease about so many things, yet part of me doesn’t want to face any of it.  

Where’s my faith?

I’m pre-worrying about a lot of things (emphasis on “pre”). Things that may or may not happen. I guess I’m trying to be prepared, but again, it’s “pre-worrying.” I don’t know if anything will change, if we’ll have to make tough decisions, or will things continue status quo? It makes me want to cower in a corner.

I didn’t know what to pray for anymore…how to pray. I hit a wall.

With all that said, today was what I’m calling “reminder” day. I’m reading the book “Standing Strong” by Alli Worthington. She inspired me previously with the chapter on self-doubt. Today, I’m in the middle of a chapter on praying  called Ask for it. On page 148, she quotes a text from her friend, who says “Ask for manna. For strength to live off manna. Because after manna comes abundance.”

Manna. Daily manna. The Lord provides just what we need when we need it. So, all of this “pre-worrying” is a waste of time. I know that. However, I certainly needed this kick in the pants reminder! Daily manna.

God heard my unspoken prayer with a reminder that he provides and he’s still with us — always, all days.

Fear can have you cowering in the corner instead of plunging ahead, facing your fears, and getting through them to grow stronger. Life’s worries can be easy to ignore, to back away from, and hide your head in the sand when everything is overwhelming.

Hide my head in the sand. Really? When God’s strength flows through us?

I have to believe that his strength will flow through me, and believe that the manna he provides is enough. And he provides manna every day. No stockpiles for a rainy day. He provides just what we need at the time we need it.

I’ve written about daily manna before. But apparently, God knew I needed the reminder. He answered my prayer when I didn’t know how to pray.

Are all my problems solved? No. Am I still concerned for my parents and everything else going on in the world? Yes. Unfortunately, that hasn’t changed. But my perspective has. God answered my prayers with the reminder that he is with us every day, and he provides. I need only to look to him.

Trust — all days, always.

Thank you, Lord for reminder days.

What about you? How does knowing that God provides help you with your worries?

Let’s encourage one another!

Find Your Footing – While Living in Limbo

Here I go again…changing my mind. I had written a blog post already, but something was holding me back from publishing it. There’s nothing wrong with the post. It just doesn’t feel like the right time.

There are so many questions in this world of uncertainty, and too many unknown answers. Are we getting out too soon? Will there be another serious outbreak of Coronavirus? Will we have to live this way the rest of our lives?

While there’s a bit more hope, with things opening up again,  there’s still an aura of trepidation. So, the cloud continues to loom over us, even when there are occasional peeks of sunshine.

As someone who likes to focus on the sunshine, there are times when the clouds overwhelm, and I just can’t muster that positive spirit.

It’s like we’re all caught in limbo and can’t seem to find solid footing again.

I hate being in limbo! I like to make a decision and move forward. Even if I make a wrong decision, you can still deal with the consequences or aftermath of that. But being in limbo feels like you’re in a wind tunnel, being batted about like a rag doll, with nothing to grasp on to so you can find solid ground.

So, what to do with these uncertain days?

Well, I don’t mean to sound cliché, but I think we try to control what we can control and leave the rest up to God. Yeah, much easier said than done. And believe me, I’m not much of an expert at the moment.

I definitely have my down days. I have my drift days, as I like to call them. Days that drift by and I haven’t accomplished anything.

But right now, I don’t want to drift. It’s important to stay focused. Whether you’re working from home or not. If you’re out of work, or have time on your hands, isn’t it a good time to learn something new? Do the project you’ve been putting off? Learn a new skill? Go back to school? (On-line universities are great!). Or get back to your old hobbies that you haven’t made time to do. I like crocheting, and am still doing that. Currently, I’m learning new crochet stitches, and am making scarves using what I’ve learned. (Yep, as we head into summer, it’s a perfect time to make winter scarves! Hee hee).

I also love painting resin figurines. My granddaughter is inspiring me to paint again, as she likes to paint side-by-side with me. Besides creating special moments together, she’s helped rekindle my love for painting.

And like a lot of people, my weight has been fluctuating while we’ve been sheltering-at-home. So, I’m exercising more, and that helps a lot! I’m still snacking a bit too much, as I start to pay attention again to what I eat, that will settle down sooner rather than later.

Now, if you think I’ve just made these decisions and it’s all a breeze, well, you’d be wrong. I have to be intentional. And right now, being intentional can seem like too much of an effort. It’s not.

The other day, I had the blues for sure. Didn’t feel like doing anything. But I had a healthy to-do list, so I prayed, then made myself sit down and tackle that list. It wasn’t easy. But as I crossed more things off, I got into a groove, and that felt good. To accomplish something felt good. I didn’t feel like exercising either, but I did, and it turned out to be a good exercise day. I was glad I put in the effort, and now I have more motivation to keep going.

Our days are going to be uncertain for a while yet. And for me personally, I can’t keep living in limbo. So, I’m going to do what I can do, within the boundaries of my own little world. By doing that, maybe I’ll find my footing, and it will feel less and less like I’m living in limbo.

What about you? Do you have ideas on how to get through this time of uncertainty? I’d love to hear from you.

Got Grace?

While we strive to have “Fierce Faith,” we know there may be some off-days ahead. Days where you are tired, sad, restless, anxious – just not feeling yourself. And despite our unprecedented pandemic circumstances, you can be tough on yourself.

I don’t know about you, but I’m a world-class champ when it comes to beating up on myself. I’m definitely harder on myself than I am on anyone else. So, on the days when I fall a little, where I’m anxious or restless, or even flat-out angry, I need to remember one word: GRACE.

We are all going through difficult times right now, and although most of us have been shelter-in-place for a bout a month now, there’s still this sense of no routine, of being off-kilter. The world hasn’t righted itself and we still don’t have a complete sense of normalcy, or what a “new” normal might look like.

Currently, I’m trudging along day-to-day, but everything feels “off.” There’s a sense of uncertainty in the air, and it’s uncomfortable, at best. So, yes, we’re going to have bad days, that’s a given. We’ll have mood swings for no apparent reason, and maybe even take out those moods on our spouse or family.

But that’s where our daily prayer time can come in – just a moment or two of quiet time (I know, those of you with small kids will find this nearly impossible). We need to take time daily to center ourselves, and every day we need to extend GRACE, not only to others, but to ourselves.

These are strange days, and our emotions may surprise us or get the better of us. Just let it go (yes, I’ve watched “Frozen” one too many times with my granddaughters!). Extend grace to others, but mostly to yourself. Take a deep breath and begin again.

 

I Failed…I didn’t Watch My Words (Video and Text)

The link below is to a video following up on last week’s “How do we talk to ourselves when we look in the mirror?” Apparently I wasn’t paying attention to my own words.

Video Link: I Didn’t Watch My Words

Here’s the text from the video:

Hi Everyone. Thank you for the great response to last week’s video on
“Watching your Words,” on how we talk to ourselves when we look in the mirror.

Before we move on, apparently, I need to go back and watch that video again.

This past weekend our granddaughters were over, and we were all playing out in the backyard. Before I go on let me give a shout out to my oldest granddaughter, who apparently likes to watch Grammy on these videos. So, hi Daphne! Grammy loves you.

Anyway, Daphne and her little sister were over and we’re all playing in the backyard and then afterwards my daughter posted some pictures on Facebook. And I saw one picture of me, and immediately started criticizing how fat I looked and how big I looked.

My husband stopped me and he said, “Is that all you see?”

My beautiful granddaughters

I sheepishly said, “Well, no. I see our beautiful granddaughters.”

And he said, “I see a Grammy out there kicking the ball with her granddaughters.”

And he has a point. I was out there playing with them and running around and kicking the ball. I wasn’t sitting on the sidelines.

But it shocked me how quickly and easily I fell back into the self-criticism mode of talking badly about myself after looking at one picture. Even when you’re watching out for how you watch your words, how you talk to yourself, you can slip back into the negative cycle.

We all have value. We all have a purpose, and the purpose of that day was me being a good Grammy. They didn’t care that I looked fat, they were glad I was out there participating.

So, I’m back to the drawing board, I need to watch my words and watch how I talk to myself.

Now, did I fail because I had this lapse? No, but it is something you need to pay attention to… I need to pay attention to. It can happen so easily.

So, we’re back on the cycle of positivity. We’re back on the cycle of I have value. And I have a purpose, and I have a meaning. And if I’m so unhappy with how I look, then I could go out and do something about it. So, stop the negativity.

Today’s the day to choose joy, and to believe in yourself and to believe in your purpose.