Tag: Determination

Being Extraordinary

I love movies! Anyone who knows me knows that I love watching movies, and I will watch and analyze the same movie over and over again. Besides the entertainment value, movies can be inspirational.

Sister Act from Buena Vista Pictures

One such movie is “Sister Act” from 1992 with Whoopi Goldberg. Wait. What? A Whoopi Goldberg movie being inspirational? Okay, maybe not the entire movie, but a portion of it, as it relates to the growth of the character of Sister Mary Robert, played by Wendy Makkena.

When Sister Mary Clarence (Goldberg) takes refuge in the convent and first meets the choir, she’s suddenly thrust into the position as leader of the choir. As Goldberg takes the reins of the group, she notices Sister Mary Robert (Makkena) blending into the background and only mouthing the words to the songs. Mary Clarence then brings Mary Robert front and center. Goldberg’s character explains that Mary Robert needs to sing loud enough to be heard over the noise of a diner, with clacking silverware and loud waitresses. Finally, Mary Robert’s voice is heard, and it’s a sweet one. Throughout the course of the movie, Mary Robert is more front and center with the choir, and doing more solos when they perform. She’s come out of her shell and is no longer hiding in the back, just mouthing the words.

How often do we find ourselves hiding and merely going through the motions? Do you have big dreams, but are plagued with self-doubt? As I may have mentioned before, I’m reading a book by Alli Worthington called “Standing Strong.” In it, Worthington talks about “playing small.” In the sense of not letting comparison, fear, or self-doubt hold you back from pursuing your dreams, or just living your life to the fullest.

Mary Robert was playing small – not letting her gifts come out because of fear, and not believing she had a true talent.

Recently, I’ve come to believe there’s no such thing as ordinary. Whether you’re a CEO, a writer, a waiter/waitress, or a housewife (or househusband), you are extraordinary. It doesn’t matter what job you have! Anything we choose to do in our lives has value. Any time we come around friends to laugh and enjoy, or comfort and console, we’re offering something special to them – something extraordinary.

Yes, there are times we feel like we’re living in a mundane world, with routine lives, feeling plain and not special. But that’s not true.

In a recent post on this blog, I asked what you wanted to be when you grew up. Is there a dream you haven’t achieved yet? For some, their lives may have taken a completely different direction, and they never had the opportunity to pursue their dreams. Goals can go by the wayside when we have the responsibility of a family and bills to pay.

That being said, remember Friends, you are not a failure. Maybe your time just hasn’t come. Or maybe you were destined for something else. I don’t know what God had in mind for you, but I know we have the ability to make our circumstances worse or better, by our own attitude. Even if we’re not where we want to be in our job or in our life, doesn’t mean we aren’t extraordinary. We can offer each other so much, just by giving of ourselves.

I’m blessed to be on a new path these days. I’m a college student again, finally completing my bachelor’s degree that I started over 40 (gasp!) years ago. Will school make me extraordinary? No, not necessarily. But school is proving to me that I’m not too old to keep pursuing my dreams. I’m not too old to influence those around me. I don’t have to keep playing it small.

My new mindset is going to be “There’s no such thing as ordinary.” Remember, you are special. You matter. You are extraordinary.

Do you believe this? Let me hear your thoughts. And let’s encourage one another.

Perspective, Momentum, and a Dry Erase Board

My recent blog posts have talked about Overcoming Self-doubt and Breaking the Negativity Cycle. Doing these things lead to a fresh start. It’s wiping the slate clean and beginning again with a new attitude and motivation to press on. That sounds great in theory, but it isn’t easy to accomplish. I relate to this in an unusual way: by looking at the large white dry erase board I have in my office.

Last year, when I revamped this blog, that white board was filled with blog post summaries, and ideas for the short videos I did at the time. I was having a blast and accomplishing so much with this renewed commitment to TalkingAmongFriends.com.

However, in August 2020, a family emergency hit that required my time and attention, and I quit posting on my blog. Then I posted sporadically, but had another dry spell in late spring and early summer of this year. It was frustrating because something I had been so excited about got pushed to the side.

Earlier this summer, the time came for me to refocus on this blog so I opened up the cabinet where my dry erase board is. On that board, there were all of last year’s ideas and accomplishments. It was a tangible symbol of my work. Until I stopped writing. Now, it almost seemed like my board was mocking me.

As I focus on writing again, I see that there are two ways of looking at that white board. One way would be the negative way, where the board showed my progress but also where it all stopped, and where I floundered for the rest of the year. You know, this is the board that mocks me.

However, in light of my recent blog posts, I need to look at that white board in a positive way: as in, “Look at all I accomplished last year!” I did so much. It should be cause for celebration not negativity!

It’s all about perspective. It’s either negativity for the year I didn’t complete, or it’s fighting the negativity cycle and self-doubt, and looking at the positive and the accomplishments.

I know myself well enough to know that the battle between discouragement and confidence will continue. However, by paying attention to how I view things, I truly want to let hope win, not fear, and not discouragement. I’m really good at beating up on myself about my lack of discipline, but in truth, last year’s white board proves that wrong. I did have the discipline. I had the desire and I was doing it! By looking at the positives, I know I can do it now.

It’s time to fill up the white board again, using all the different colored markers I can find!

How about you? How do you get back on track when you lose momentum? How would a change in perspective help? I’d love to hear from you.

Let’s encourage one another.

I Failed…I didn’t Watch My Words (Video and Text)

The link below is to a video following up on last week’s “How do we talk to ourselves when we look in the mirror?” Apparently I wasn’t paying attention to my own words.

Video Link: I Didn’t Watch My Words

Here’s the text from the video:

Hi Everyone. Thank you for the great response to last week’s video on
“Watching your Words,” on how we talk to ourselves when we look in the mirror.

Before we move on, apparently, I need to go back and watch that video again.

This past weekend our granddaughters were over, and we were all playing out in the backyard. Before I go on let me give a shout out to my oldest granddaughter, who apparently likes to watch Grammy on these videos. So, hi Daphne! Grammy loves you.

Anyway, Daphne and her little sister were over and we’re all playing in the backyard and then afterwards my daughter posted some pictures on Facebook. And I saw one picture of me, and immediately started criticizing how fat I looked and how big I looked.

My husband stopped me and he said, “Is that all you see?”

My beautiful granddaughters

I sheepishly said, “Well, no. I see our beautiful granddaughters.”

And he said, “I see a Grammy out there kicking the ball with her granddaughters.”

And he has a point. I was out there playing with them and running around and kicking the ball. I wasn’t sitting on the sidelines.

But it shocked me how quickly and easily I fell back into the self-criticism mode of talking badly about myself after looking at one picture. Even when you’re watching out for how you watch your words, how you talk to yourself, you can slip back into the negative cycle.

We all have value. We all have a purpose, and the purpose of that day was me being a good Grammy. They didn’t care that I looked fat, they were glad I was out there participating.

So, I’m back to the drawing board, I need to watch my words and watch how I talk to myself.

Now, did I fail because I had this lapse? No, but it is something you need to pay attention to… I need to pay attention to. It can happen so easily.

So, we’re back on the cycle of positivity. We’re back on the cycle of I have value. And I have a purpose, and I have a meaning. And if I’m so unhappy with how I look, then I could go out and do something about it. So, stop the negativity.

Today’s the day to choose joy, and to believe in yourself and to believe in your purpose.

Motivation – Or Lack Thereof

(Before we get started, I’m also blogging over at www.LearnHowToWriteaNovel.com about the 3 D’s of Writing – somehow these two blogs are related).

Okay, for today,  let’s talk about motivation. We all need motivation to exercise, eat better, and for me, to also write every day.

And everyday, either in my devotional reading or on social media, I see all kinds of inspiring quotes that seem like they were written just for me. They get me fired up, and I say Yes, that’s me, and then I’m encouraged to do my best each day.

But then, inevitably, there comes a day where you wake up, and you know you’re not feeling it. You’re somewhat cranky, or you just want to shut out the world. The quotes and memes that so inspired you fly from your head like they never existed. Motivation has fled the scene.

So, then what? How do you move forward when all you want to do is watch mindless television and eat popcorn with peanut M&M’s?

You can go two ways with this:

  1. Sometimes you do need a break. You need to sit back and rest and rejuvenate. If you’re not at your best then you won’t deliver your best.
  2. But more often than not, we need to find a way to push through it. Move forward. That may mean breaking down tasks into even smaller pieces and slowly start to get things done. When you move forward, then your momentum and motivation might find you.

Today is one of those days for me, where motivation has fled the scene. I didn’t wake up in a bad mood, but I didn’t wake up with a smile either.

So, I’m going to put item #2 to the test today. Break things down and find a way to move forward when in reality, popcorn, M&M’s and movies I’ve seen a hundred times before are calling my name.

If I can get going, then I know I’ll feel better and feel like I accomplished something. Sitting with my popcorn won’t make me feel better, it will probably make me feel worse.

And by writing this blog, I’ve already accomplished one thing! I haven’t written in several days (due to being sick mostly), so this will help me get back on track. Hopefully, by getting some of these thoughts out of my head, I can look to the next step I need to take and what else needs to be done today.

I’m stronger than my lack of motivation. (Does that make sense?) On mornings when I wake up in a blah mood, I need to remember that. Perhaps that’s the best inspirational quote I can keep in mind — I’m stronger.

What about you? How do you find motivation when it has gone away? I’d love to hear from you.

Have a great productive day, everybody!