Are You on the Hamster Wheel?

Why is it I struggle so much at the beginning of the new year? The new year is supposed to bring a promise of great things, a new beginning, a fresh start. I’m excited and awakened to new possibilities. Yet, it’s not too long into January, where I find myself floundering….already. It’s so discouraging!

You’ve heard it said that most new year’s resolutions fail before January is over. Another study says by the second week of February. In other words, resolutions are difficult to keep. I don’t necessarily make resolutions, however, I do set goals and try to go after them with a renewed vigor. But like last year, when I felt like I was being batted around like a ball in a pinball machine, this year, I feel like I’m on a hamster wheel, spinning faster and faster, and never getting anywhere. It is frustrating. I can see how easily the “new” from the new year wears off, and the gray days of winter overtake us again. Then like I said, I’m back to floundering, and frustrated…. And any other f-words you can think of, like freefalling. (And shame on you if you went “there” with the f-word – grin).

In looking at my January flounderings, I wonder if I get too overwhelmed at the prospect of all I want to accomplish in a year. You’ve heard the joke about eating an elephant? You can only eat it one bite at a time. Like many of us I believe I look at the entire elephant, and think there’s no way! Not even in bite-sized pieces. Once you’re overwhelmed by looking at the entire elephant, or the entire year before you, it stops you in your tracks. You give up, say there’s no point, and chuck your planner in the trash.

There’s one the key thing to remember when you reach this point: STOP! Stop beating up on yourself. Stop looking at the entire elephant, and focus only on what you need to do next.

Get off the hamster wheel, and tackle what needs to be done today and only for today. How do you do this?

For me, time management is usually my problem. Knowing this, I’m going to try to schedule my days better. Go back to the basics: Make a list. Then do the next thing. I’m not going to worry about tomorrow’s list, or beat myself up for what didn’t get done on yesterday’s list. I’m only going to focus on the next thing. If I get interrupted, then I adjust my schedule. Sounds simple, right? What if you don’t know what should even be ON the list? Well, I’m not sure I can help you there. But here’s a thought. If you can’t get specific with itemizing a list, what about blocking off chunks of time to work on a certain project? Then another block of time will be devoted to the next project?

If you get interrupted within that block of time, then shift it to another day (making sure you have some flex in your schedule to shift to).

This concept is from one of my writing groups, where the author blocks off her writing time, then blocks off family time, then has exercise time, etc. She leaves one day free in her week in case something does need to shift. This all makes sense to me, and that’s how I’m scheduling my days.

I’m not sure how it’s all going to work out, but I have to try something. I want to get off this hamster wheel, and work toward my goals. Whether I succeed or fail, at least I can take the next step.

What about you? Are you floundering this year? Going in circles on a hamster wheel? What advice do you have for getting off the spinning wheel and making progress?

Finding the Balance (Video plus text)

The link below is about finding the balance between your to-do list and quiet time. Or you can just read the text of the video below.

See the video here

Hey everyone, the last couple of weeks on TalkingAmongFriends.com, I did a post on “Time’s a Wastin'”, about how I don’t like frittering the day away, having a drift day. And then the next post was “The Silence was Deafening”, where there could be so much noise in the world, that when silence happens it’s something you need to pay attention to. I referred back to my days in broadcasting, where at the radio station you always had the radio on in the background. But you could ignore it go about your day. You know, the phones are ringing and people were talking, whatever. But if the radio station went off the air for any reason, it’s like you heard that the silence was deafening. It was the only way I really understood that expression.

So now, last couple days I’ve been kind of buried under a to-do list of things to do. And sometimes when I get so busy or get so overwhelmed with things to do, I kind of freeze up and I don’t want to do that. That could lead to the “Times a-Wastin;” days.

What I’d like to do is: if I have a to do list is to attack it. Get things done and you always feel better. But sometimes you do need to stop and only stop for a brief time and have that moment of silence. Have that moment of quiet to where you can just breathe. Take a deep breath and soak things in. Have a little prayer time, meditation, whatever floats your boat. For me, it’s prayer time. And in a way that can refresh your soul.

Just stop, breathe, get refreshed, and then tackle that to do list. So, there’s always a balance between your to do list and a quiet time, and between wasting time, and just taking a pause to find refreshment. And, you know, sometimes I’m not a very good tightrope walker. It’s hard to find the balance. But it’s something we can always strive for, right?

So, here’s to quality quiet time and attacking that to do list. And I hope you can find the balance.

Take care. We’ll see you next time.

Time’s A-Wastin’

Every week, I try to have a spark of creative brilliance for this blog. It’s called “Talking Among Friends” for a reason. I want the posts to be something that most of us can relate to and be topics that start conversations. And I want it to be a place where we feel less alone, because, guess what, someone is usually going through the same thing you are.

As much as I try to plan ahead and have words of wisdom to share, there are weeks where the words don’t want to come. And it’s not because I’m overly busy or haven’t had the time to work on the posts.

In fact, one of the most annoying things to me is when I have a block of time to work and I either do something else, or fritter my time away thinking I can do this later. Then, you guessed it, something else always comes up later that needs my attention.

I don’t like wasting time and I don’t like being a procrastinator. Yet, I can be very, very good at both of those things. This leads to frustration, and that frustration can sometimes stop me in my tracks. I feel like going off in a corner to sulk….or at least crochet something.

It’s too easy to look back and see those wasted days, or “drift days” as I call them and start getting down on myself. This is a topic that has been covered recently on this blog  so no need to belabor it here.

Instead, what I want to happen when I look back is to learn the lessons of the past, and carry those lessons into a positive future. We don’t know how many days we have here on earth, and I don’t want to spend those days fretting about what I didn’t accomplish yesterday.

Instead, I want to focus on what I can do today, right now. Whether it be getting my clothes out of the dryer and finally folding them, or doing an act of kindness for someone, or sitting my backside in my chair and writing a blog post.

Life is too short to waste time looking backwards. If I learn something from my past, then I become a changed person and I’m not who I once was. This goes back to not dragging around the weight of mistakes on my shoulders. Every day is a new, fresh start.

So, we begin again today, with a new perspective. I don’t have to be who I once was. I can keep moving forward (if you haven’t seen Disney’s “Meet the Robinsons”, you should. There’s a good message in that movie).

And maybe every day I move ahead, there will be less and less wasted days behind me.

Do you have any good advice or tips on how to combat wasted days or shedding your past mistakes? Please share!

Meanwhile, choose joy this week. Talk with you soon.

 

Are you a Pinball Wizard?

@RebeccaYauger

I don’t know if this is true for you, but it seems in the past week or so, I feel like a ball in a pinball machine, just being bounced around from side to side, and up and down.

Like most of us, I started the new year with goals, dreams, and aspirations of what I want to accomplish. It’s going okay — not great, as evidenced from my blog last week about my frustration.

This week, I started again with a fresh attitude. And almost immediately there were numerous things that cried out for my attention and had me floundering. Like I mentioned last time, I felt like I had too many tabs open on my computer, or more accurately, too many tabs open in my brain! I was quickly pulled in so many different directions that I wasn’t doing any of things that I needed to do.

I was like a pinball in the machine, rebounding off the obstacles around me. I’d rather be a pinball wizard. In the Pete Townshend song, the pinball wizard is the one who mastered the game. All I want to do is master my to-do list.

This leads me to a question. Why do we always feel like we have to do everything at once? Most of us know that when we get scattered, nothing gets done well, or done correctly, therefore we’re not accomplishing anything and we’re making more mistakes.

How do we rectify this?

It should be simple:

*Do one thing at a time
*Slow down to do that one thing very well
*Move on to the next thing – and do that one very well.

But time can work against me. Until I tackle everything I want to right now, I may have to spend extra hours in the evening or get up earlier in the morning to get a jump start on things. It will be  worth it to find that quiet time where I can concentrate before the rest of the day intrudes.

This is not a new concept, but it is one that bears remembering. It’s okay to re-group and begin again. (I wrote about something similar for my writer’s group, if you’re interested).

So, in order to start again, here are some suggestions:

  1. PRAY OVER YOUR DAY FIRST! Remember the words of James 1:5 (NIV) “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Am I going to be instantly smarter by asking for wisdom? No. But in making time for prayer every day, I hope to stay within God’s will and on the path He has for me.
  2. Make a List. If you don’t have a to-do list, then make one. Whether it’s on your phone, computer, or handwritten, it helps to have a list to stay organized. Find a system that works for you.
  3. Do one thing at a time. Maybe attempt the biggest job first, so the heaviest weight is off of your shoulders.
  4. Get up earlier (or stay up later) and do some things in peace and quiet before the rest of the house wakes up, or while the rest of the house is asleep.

These are all fairly simple to do for those times when we’re being bounced around. Let’s try to be the pinball wizard, instead of the pin ball itself.

Hang in there, friends, and we’ll get through this.